THE NO-KNOCK POLICY

Article from Today

-- felt that this is something we can all learn from...

We've been talking these last few days about those youngsters who need a little help in
coping with peer pressure and rejection.

These are the boys and girls who are just a little different, physically or emotionally,
which places them at risk for problems with low self-esteem. Another suggestion for
parents is that they teach their kids what I call a "no-knock" policy. One of the common
characteristics of a person who feels inadequate is that he or she talks about it to
anyone who will listen.

An overweight man, for example, feels that he ought to apologise to his friends for ordering a hot fudge sundae. "I'm fat enough without eating this," he says.

Or a woman who thinks she's unintelligent will admit freely, "Oh, I'm really bad at math. You know, I can't even add two and two."

Now, this kind of self-criticism isn't as uncommon as we might think.

You might even be surprised by how often you tell your friends about your own faults and while you're babbling about all your inadequacies, the listener is formulating impressions of you.

After all, you're the expert on that subject. If you think you're a loser, then others are going to tend to see you that way.

You can help your child understand this simple principle. Teach him or her to accept blame and criticism when it's valid, but not to continually talk about embarrassing flaws and failures. If your kids learn to respect themselves, others will tend to be more respectful, too. It's called a "no-knock" policy.