very tired now. so just gonna ramble. be warned.

guess what? after i wrote the blog yesterday, dear told me he bought the harry potter book for me le. sweet. so i have it now. will start reading it the moment i get my hands on it. *laughs hysterically*

been having restless nights lately. not sleeping well. my mind is simply just not resting. my few hours of sleep basically consists of me developing dreams, and ill wake up after one dream to slip into the next once i go back to bed. what kind of rest am i having?? i do NOT want to have ANY dreams at all, makes me think too much. and this waking up issue is irritating the shit out of me, can't i just have peace?!

just when i thought my morning couldnt get any worse, i had to receive an msn from vanessa (a "friend" who have refused to contact me during the past year due to some unresolved issues), asking me to take care of ray, and to say that she's sorry for everything. when asked wat was wrong, she refused to come straight to the point but instead just went beating around the bush. asked her if she's going to end her life, she went offline. wow. nice. i freaked out.

managed to get to van's sis. and convinced ray to go down with me to her house to ensure that she's alright (n i do appreciate ray for coming down *hugs* thanks gal). we really got a shock of our lives when we saw her. but she seems to choose to live in her world now, no matter what we say doesnt seem to sink into her.

how can anyone tolerate the physical abuse of their partner? and no one is stopping you from helping the "china crow" if its within ur means, not when u have accumulated one body full of bruises n a whole lot of debts, all these for NOTHING. she only wants money, don't u see that?? if you're not going to respect and love yourself, no one will. and nobody can help u stand up and move on if u choose not to. so pls get a life! im really washing my hands off this whole saga, our "friendship", if you so choose to be devoted to a worthless piece of shit.

went for drinks at alley bar with ray after our "counselling" session with vanessa. continued to discuss about the whole issue and be disgusted by the whole affair. alley bar ran out of chips! sad. decided to hop to living room at the marriott hotel. nice chill out place. though it did evoke some unwanted memories. but well. fuck it. met ray's gf, meiping... hmm, pleasant looking girl. we repeated our whole saga again (think i can consider scripting it out for casting of a drama serial), and after couple of drinks decided to head home cos i was feeling tired already.

arrived home (hr-n-a half ago), decided i couldnt sleep so came online to check mails and stuff. realised adeline finally sent us the pics of the primary school friends gathering that we had few weeks' ago. will post it up in abit. chatted on msn for abit with larry n bro desmond. dear is out with his teammates. they apparently went to this bar/pub "bonkers" at tanjong pagar (wonder if you'd go nuts thereafter, haha!) and spposedly having his supper now.

haiz. im really feeling v tired n worn out. mebbe bcos its what my friends are going through. failed relationships. betrayal. disappointments. dont get me wrong. i want to stand by them, be there for them as i am now bcos its important to me. perhaps i need my lavender candle to help me relax and get in touch with my inner senses (i.e if i have them =P). but the shop that sells it has closed down. sigh. dont know where to get it now. and i m very particular. so well wish me luck.

enough lamenting today. the pics are posted below. going sleep now. its 2am.

Shot 1: (Order from left to right)
Adeline, Leslie, KaiHan, Bernard, Joanne, pinkie

Shot 2

Shot 3 (i'm somewhat hidden by now =P)

** did anyone even notice Leslie & KaiHan are both wearing the same spectacle frames!! Hahaha~